Thursday, July 19, 2007

I Win Some, I Lose Some

Well, I got a skein of Wollmeise in the Loopy blitzkrieg. I'm anxious to see this stuff. I hear the Pope just put it on the fast track to canonization.

I'm not ashamed of the fact that my TiVo is picking up Victoria Beckham: Coming to America right now. I love Posh, and I don't care how self-absorbed, or not, she is, and if there's even a CHANCE I'll get to see a train wreck, I'm there. Remember the Britney & Kevin mess show on UPN? Yeah, I watched every episode. I know it's shameful and I'm contributing to the complete and utter downfall of society as we know it - but dammit, I must take advantage of the opportunity to feel like I'm better than someone who has more piles of money than I can even drum up in my fantasies. Update: What the hell???? Apparently it was so vilified in the press, Bravo decided to run a Kathy Griffin rerun instead. I've never in my life been disappointed to hear Kathy's voice, but this is a real blow. 2nd Update: No, it's okay, they just bumped it. It's on in an hour. Whew! Just to be on the safe side, I've programmed the TiVo to pick up the next three hours. Don't you judge me.

Work's been rough lately. Times are hard, budgets are crunched. Tough on everyone...I do seem to be okay, individually speaking, for now, for whatever it's worth. (Maybe that little bit of dreary explains my need to shake my head and be mortified at Posh and her man-meat husband.)

Oh, oh, oh - the book! God, can I WAIT for this book?? I'm getting it in the mail on Saturday, and I don't know that I'll be able to stand it. I may have to show up at the bookshop to get it at midnight Friday. I'm sure I could sneak that copy back to them and no one will ever be the wiser....but seriously, how am I supposed to sleep Friday night??

You gotta see this. A few days before the wedding, we came home from work to find the world's most enormous unannounced crater in our front yard; apparently the city had to fix the neighbour's septic piping or whatever, and they didn't feel like it was necessary to let us know that they were going to tear the holy hell out of our yard. They assured us they were going to fix it, and they did, in a sense. They piled dirt around and tossed some sod on it (without leveling the dirt first) with little to no regard for where our sprinklers were. Travis called them, and they came out and unburied a couple of sprinkler heads, breaking them both in the process. He called again and mentioned that we could swear our front yard was level when we bought the place, and now it looks like we've been digging shallow graves all over the front yard and would they please come fix the sprinklers AND the lawn? And then Tuesday, we got this:

My God

I have to note that this all happened the day I was working from home, and I watched this entire process, laughing my big ol' ass off. I don't have it in me to get mad, because it's just funny to me that someone would call the city and complain, and THIS would be their idea of fixing it. Backhoe tracks, piles of dirt, and a small square of dead sod. (As a person capable of mind-boggling laziness, I know that they're employing the "screw it up worse and worse until they just decide to fix it themselves" technique, and they're in for a fight. They only THINK they'll win in the Battle of the Lazy. You're city workers. I'm FEDERAL. Bring it.)

Moving on: no one is on fire in a ditch. My friend got in touch with me, so I'm quite certain now that it's okay to mentally pull her out of the imaginary twisted pile of metal, hose her down with an extinguisher, straighten her blouse, and apologize. (Thank you for all your reassurances that even though I'm crazy, you have a friend who's crazy like me too. Appreciated.) ;-)

So. This stole. This....thing. This. THING. This M*****F***ING THING.

Mystery Stole 3

I spoke too soon. Remember that post earlier where I loudly and proudly extolled my own virtues and praised myself for not having to tink ever anything at all yay me I rule neener neener? Yeah, well, I can just roll that up real tight and cram it - I've had to tink every single one of the last four or five right-side rows. I get to the end and every time I'm one or two stitches short or over. I'm going to light this stupid thing on fire if it happens one more time.

Sorry, that could be the heat speaking. (The A/C has pooped on us again. We're back to living downstairs, and I brought all the roving down too. I'm thinking about packing up all the yarn and bringing it down, but that's a little daunting a prospect. Travis is still certain he can fix it, and I'm still certain we can live happily ever after without ever going upstairs again, so either way we win.)

I'm conflicted about something - the Orlando "Not Your Grandma's Knitting Group" is doing a yarn crawl around Orlando next Saturday, and they're even getting Carla (Chez Cas) to open the shop just for them. I really would love to have a local knitting group, and this seems like a wicked cool group of chicks, from what I've seen. But my aversion to the "not your grandma"/"not your mother" take on knitting is well-documented, and while I'm certain it'd be fun, what if I'm a jerk? (Remember, I'm kind of obnoxious.) I'm meditating on it.....Update: I'm being silly. Cool knitters are cool knitters, and what's in a name? I wanna go!

How about this for a nice morning pick-me-up?

Thank you God for this beautiful, beautiful day

YES!!!!! Oh man, do I wish I had some iron to be worked. I would hire these guys in a heartbeat. (Again, I'd like to note my questionable future capabilities as to raising children. This is not the sort of thing I should giggle at...the kids will ask what's funny...and I won't lie to my children, and so I'll have to explain to them why even though I'm a zillion years old, boners are still funny.)

In other awesome news: Kathleen* is going to be here NEXT WEEK! SQUEEE!!!!

*Kathleen and I worked together for about a week before she moved off to Germany - pain in my arse - and took all her coolness with her. I credit her with my renewed interest in knitting; well, my mom started it and then Kathleen finished it off. I stumbled onto her blog - perhaps by Googling her name, like a stalker, but I don't recall and/or it's not really important - and discovered that she was KNITTING now, which, I mean, how uncool is that and what's happened to my friend Kathleen? Then I figured if she did it, it must be cool, so I gave it another shot, having suffered through one failed half-ass at an acrylic garter stitch something ... scarf? ... and now, well, here I am.)